A Game of Thrones

A few weeks ago (four to be exact) I finished A Game of Thrones, the first book in the A Song of Ice and Fire  series by George R.R. Martin.

It was an extremely well written novel.  It was executed with the precision that a lot of writers lack.  His prose far exceeds almost every writer I've ever read.  Yes, that would even include Terry Goodkind.

While I enjoyed the read because of the quality in the writing, I did not enjoy the story.  Okay, maybe that's too strong of a statement.  The story is quite engaging and I wanted to continue reading.  I'm reading A Clash of Kings right now and it's keeping my attention well enough.

However, the story hasn't grasped me like The Sword of Truth series did.  Wizard's First Rule was inspiring, albeit not incredibly well written.  This allowed me to look beyond the lack of writing experience evident in Goodkind's prose.  Because the story gripped me from the first page, it was easy to fly through 10 more books (except Pillars of Creation, fuck that book).

My problem with ASoIaF is that it's boring.  It's almost too accurate in terms of medieval happenings.  Men fight over thrones, most die, the ones you want to succeed don't and are more often than not killed.  Women account for nothing, the ones that are strong are hidden under male aliases, and their story ends up shunted to the side and is ultimately unimportant to the major plot.

Even though the books are incredibly well written, they're slow and tedious and boring.  There's little action.  There's a ton of talk.  The men are windbags full of hot air.  The women are vaginae for the men to rape, or whores for the men to pay.  There have been only one or two willing sex scenes in these books and they were "Ned rolls off his wife" and "Theon pulled up his trousers".

There is no love.  None whatsoever.  Everyone hates everyone else.  Nobody has any true friends.  Jon is shaping up as a decent character in A Clash of Kings, but he's featured so infrequently that I don't think he'll be very important later on.  Which is sad because I thought he would be.

Tyrion is the only character I like.  He's devious, cruel, and yet manages to find love in the oddest places.  Supposedly, he took a fifteen year old girl to his bed when he was also fifteen himself and wanted to marry her.  But because she was so lowly born, Tyrion's father would not allow it, and threw her out of their home.  Tyrion develops a love for whores since they're the only somewhat attractive women who are willing to take him to bed.  He ends up quite close to a few in particular (I imagine Shae will probably die by the end of A Clash ...)

Unfortunately, one character's more normal behavior does not make up for about twenty other characters ridiculously frustrating behavior.  Everyone else acts with malice and malcontent in their hearts for almost every other character.  Even Tyrion trusts no one.

So far my opinion of the serious is only based on one and a half books but I doubt that will change much.  I'd like to see Arya and Jon become more important, I'd like to see several people die (Cersei, Gregor Clegane, Joffrey, Lysa Arryn, her son Robert, Jaimie Lannister, Sansa ... and more).

But all the characters I hate will most likely not die.  And the ones I'm okay with (Renly Baratheon, Stannis Baratheon, Theon Greyjoy, Arya, Jon, Danaerys, etc.) will most likely die.

Except Tyrion.  I don't see him being killed off.  He's wriggled out of death a few times already so I don't see that happening.

I'd give Game of Thrones a 5 out of 5 simply because it's so well written.  It's good, it's engaging, but at the same time, it's boring and dull and lacks action.  I can't fault it for not striking my fancy, so it still gets a 5 out of 5.

Edit 04/24/2012:  I would suggest reading this little bit that describes the main problems I have with these books, and why I don't get how some people love these books:

http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-problems-with-living-in-game-thrones-universe/

There was one other bit that, while I don't remember where I read it, pointed out a large issue Martin has with writing female characters.  Danaerys is walking around some place, being her boring character, and there's a part described where "her small breasts move freely" under her shift.

Um.  Women don't think like that.  If you're writing from her point of view, that is not what should be going through her head.  Martin does not know how to write women.  All the women in these books have similar thought processes.

I'm aware his books are supposed to be an accurate representation of medieval Europe.  Well, I hate medieval Europe.  It's a time in history where I would have been A.) Sold, B.) Poor, C.)Slave, D.) Forced to marry a much older man who I didn't know when I was 13, E.) died early on of some terrible sickness or F.) Regularly raped or threatened with Rape.

I don't like medievally accurate "fantasy".  It's just not my cup of tea.  I don't think I'll ever get back to this series.  I just wanted to add to this entry because I felt it necessary to point out some of my issues with the series.